The Making of a Family

God in his great love and infinite wisdom gave us families. In our families we are intended to discover our identity, strength, nurturance, and growth. However, there is no such thing as a perfect family. Because humans are flawed and sinful creatures, our families often struggle with many problems.

            

Let’s face it – living in families can sometimes be tough! Selfishness, stubbornness, and sin have a way of creeping into our homes and often taking over.

            

When I stand up to preach on Sundays, I’m looking at dearly beloved people in the congregation, despite the reality that they often come from broken homes resulting from divorce, single-parent households, blended/step families, and families in which grandparents are caring for their grandchildren.

In the Old Testament we observe families that struggled due to polygamy, barrenness, unfaithfulness, sibling rivalry, betrayal, favoritism, and loss. That being said, I still believe God is passionate about families and calls believers to a higher standard in his heavenly household.

Eph. 5:22—6:4 provides us with a spiritual blueprint for how Christian families ought to look and function with there being mutual submission, sacrifice, and sanctification between husband and wives, as well as between parents and children.

If we take the word FAMILY, and use it as an acrostic, we can come up with some important basic elements for Christian families to thrive and be a place of hope and joy.

Faith

The home is a place where the Christian faith should be revealed and upheld and where forgiveness ought to be freely offered.

Psalm 127:1a, 3-4 (ESV), “Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain … ³ Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,the fruit of the womb a reward.⁴ Like arrows in the hand of a warriorare the children of one's youth.”

Acceptance

Of all places in the world, the home is one in which people of all ages and personalities should feel accepted and valued.        

Romans 15:7 (NIV) says, “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.”

Mercy

The home is an environment in which mercy should reign and kindness be the norm (not the exception).

Psalm 103:13 (ESV) says, “As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.” In Luke 6:36 (ESV) Jesus commands, “Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful.”

Instruction

The home is the first school. It is a place of learning in a safe and nurturing environment – learning about life, work, relationships, the world and God.

Deut. 6:4-9 describes the need for a natural integration of God’s Word into the fabric of everyday life in the home.

Prov. 1:8-9 (ESV) says, “Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.”

Prov. 22:6 (ESV) asserts, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

In Ephesians 6:4 (ESV), Paul says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

Love

Love in the home must manifest itself in intention, word and deed. In describing the virtuous woman, the wise man states in Prov. 31:15 (ESV), “She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.” Here we see an example of loving self-sacrifice.

In Eph. 5:25 (ESV) we read, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”

Yielding

Eph. 5:22-24 (ESV) states, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”

Wives are equal to their husbands in importance, but they are different in role within the marriage and family. Paul challenges women in the home to live in deference and respect to their husbands. Children are likewise to live in obedience and proper respect to their parents.

Eph. 6:1-3 (ESV) says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 

F-A-M-I-L-Y stands for Faith/Forgiveness, Acceptance, Mercy, Instruction, Love, and Yielding. May our families bring glory, honor and praise to God through our Christian example.